How can I break up with someone who is threatening to commit suicide?

I'm 16.My boyfriend has violated my trust.He has done some awful things to me.I don't want him anymore.The other day we we're driving in the car.I was telling him how he needed to find someone else and he opened the car door trying to jump out.He keeps saying he's gonna kill himself to keep himself if I leave.I told him no girl is worth killing himself.I don't believe he is gonna do it though.But,I'm scared because he does have a mental health problem.He is on medication but apparently it isn't working.His parents already know about him trying to kill himself!How can I break up with someone who is threatening to commit suicide?
He also has control issues, he is trying to keep you by intimidation. Get away from him, you don't want him to start harming you, which will be the next step. Tell his parents that you are breaking up with him, you can do it in a letter, but also let them know how he tried to jump out of the car. If you really feel that he will commit suicide, call the police. But once you break up, don't look back. You can not blame yourself for what someone does to themselves.How can I break up with someone who is threatening to commit suicide?
i doubt he will do it, becuase when people do it they dont talk about it. they kill them self quietly.


he has you on check cause he knows that's the only way he can keep you so that you don't leave him. i think you should tell him 'look we both need to go our separate ways and find other people to be with, because this is not a healthy relationship. if you truly love me then you will agree to this.'


also, after you tell him that try talking to his parents about this so that they can talk to him and/or keep a close eye on him. maybe even try and get him some help, because i believe manipulating someone like that is kind of like being abusive [by keeping you in the relationship by putting his life on the line %26amp; guilt tripping you, because he claims that he will commit suicide].
Explicitly warn his parents what he is saying and doing, call non-emergency 9-1-1 and report this. Or, there are various suicide hot-lines that may be able to help. After this, you need to break up with him. You cannot do more than that, and whatever happens is in NO way your fault. You can't control him, anything he does is his own choice. Do not let him control you.
Sometimes in life we have to do what is best for us/ what keeps us safe. Your boyfriend sound typical and chances are he will not. Be sure to be kind even if he doesn't deserve it, And do it in front of his parents, so they are aware of the problem and know that they will need to keep an eye on him. And then what he does is on him, not you. We can't Control how others will react to what we say, we can only try to say it the nicest way possible. Good luck, he wont kill himself, death sucks more than being dumped.
ugh ive done this :/ sucks and you dont think he will do it but if he does you will feel terrible.





Call his parents sometime and talk to them without your bf. then tell them what he is doing and saying. But that you aren't happy with him any more and you want to move on. But you are worried about him and dont want him to hurt himself. They will probably understand and then sit down with him and his parents at his house and say that you dont want to be with him any more. that way his parents will be able to watch him and they can help him. Just say you want him to get help.. and if he really cared for you that he will let you move on.
oh god i sort of have a friend like this.. i really have no clue what to do. maby since in this case his parents know and stuff.. have him go to some clinic to get help? maby.. talk to his parents about it. and maby just be friends with him? idk but good luck
His threats(both verbal and physical) of suicide, if you leave him are manipulative, but those are key elements to some mental health problems.





My (ex)fiance was diagnosed in 1999 with Bipolar II Disorder, three years(2002) before we got engaged. She ended the engagement in 2007 claiming I was abusive towards her. While the daily possibility of her committing suicide was always on my mind, she was verbally abusive towards me. One criteria for Bipolar II is 'grandiose'(thinking they know more than you about a subject, when it is obvious they don't) behavior. She told me thirteen times(I remember the number because, it was a different one each time) I had a mental or physical illness.





I guess I was lucky. Because she never threatened suicide when I left her once.





When I told her to stop 'diagnosing' me, she accused me of controlling her.
Taking a suicidal person seriously is the first step to help prevent suicide.





If he threatens or makes statements referring to suicide, take him seriously. Many people have taken their lives when people thought their statements about suicide were ';manipulative'; or the person was being ';melodramatic';. Many people have died ';accidentally';. They may take some medication, for example, just to get others to hear them and feel they will be discovered and saved. Instead of calling attention to their needs, they in fact, died.


If he is telling you either in person or over the phone that he is going to kill himself, you call 911 right now. Law enforcement will come to his home and take him to be evaluated by a mental health person. Even if you feel in your heart, that he will not take his life, you go by what he are telling you. Don't wait to get over to his home to call 911. You call 911 right now from where ever you are.


If he forbids you to call, is angry about it or upset, you call anyway. If you need to go to a neighbor's home to call, do it. If it's in the middle of the night, wake up the neighbor and make that call.


If he is calling from an unknown location and discusses suicide, try to find out where he is. You cannot send someone to them if you do not know where to find him.


What if he has you in confidence and makes you swear that you will not tell anyone how he is feeling? Do you keep that confidence? No. Would you be a lousy friend, mother, etc., if you broke that confidence? No. Suicidal discussion automatically ends confidentiality.


A person in crisis may not be aware that they are in need of help or be able to seek it on their own. They may also need to be reminded that effective treatment for depression is available, and that many people can very quickly begin to experience relief from depressive symptoms.





Ask these questions first:





1. Plan - do they have one?


2. Lethality - is it lethal? Can they die?


3. Availability - do they have the means to carry it out?


4. Illness - do they have a mental or physical illness?


5. Depression - chronic or specific incident(s)?





What if the person does not ';qualify'; for the above statements? Do you not take them seriously? Yes, always take people seriously when suicide is discussed. If they truly want to die, they may not tell you the truth about their plan.





All it takes is for someone to say, ';I am going to kill myself'; to call 911. When law enforcement comes, they will assess the person. They will talk to the person. There are times where the person is not ';taken'; by law enforcement, but I do believe it is helpful to have law enforcement there to talk with them.





After you have taken emergency measures as described above, or the person is not in immediate risk, what do you say to them?





Do not:


* Judge them


* Show anger towards them


* Provoke guilt


* Discount their feelings


* Tell them to ';snap out of it';


Do:


* Acknowledge and accept their feelings even if they appear distorted - ';You sound like you are feeling abandoned...';, ';That must have hurt you terribly...';, ';How does that make you feel...?';, ';Are you feeling like there is no hope?';


* Be an active listener - repeat some of their statements back to them to let them know you are listening. For example, ';So what you are saying is....';, ';I'm hearing you saying you hate yourself...';, ';I hear you saying you want to die...';, etc.


* Try to give them hope and remind them what they are feeling is temporary, without provoking guilt. ';I know you feel you cannot go on, but things will get better';, ';What you are feeling is temporary';, ';I believe in you and that you will get better';, ';There is a light at the end of the tunnel - it's okay if you don't see it now';.


* Be there for them. If they are not there with you, go to them or have them come to you. It is better if you go to them, in case they don't show up where you are.


* Show love and encouragement. Hold them, hug them, touch them. Allow them to show their feelings. Allow them to cry, to show anger, etc. Let them know you hear them and are there for them. Let them know it is okay to feel what they feel, even if it is distorted. Let them know you accept them right where they are now. If you love them, tell them.


* Pamper them. Feed them if they are hungry. Let them shower if you feel that will help them. Rent a movie if they feel like it. Turn on their favorite music if it makes them feel better.


* Help them get some help. If phone calls are needed for counseling, drug recovery, doctor appointments, etc., encourage them to make these calls. It is better if they call, but it's okay if you need to make these calls if their level of functioning is low. If they have a counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist, etc., this is a good time to call them if the person is still at risk. If it's evening and the person is not at risk, calls should be made the next day to these people
That's not cool, and it's not fair to you. That is a terrible thing to hold against someone... ';be miserable with me, or else I will kill myself';. It's pathetic.





You just need to break up with him. Tell him that what he has said shows you that he doesn't really love you... he's just needy. Tell him that you can't fix what is broken within him. You are only 16, and you can't waste your youth on this kind of drama.





Good luck. If he were to actually do anything (which I highly doubt he would)... you need to know that it is NOT YOUR FAULT. You have every right to do what's best for yourself.
friend, tell him you cant take it. tell him if he wants to die, than go ahead and do it, but just keep me out of it. dont let him drag you into junk like that. if he does it, forgive him. if he doesnt, try to forgive him, but stay away. if he truly loves you, truly wants you to be happy, he will let you go. tell him to get help, just dont let him manipulate you. i would try to break away from him, unless you think he can take that kind of blow...





believe me...it doesnt help to hold onto things like this. if he comes back AFTER HE HAS BEEN TREATED than make your own decision.





hope this helped...
Tell his parents what he has been doing and what he says to you, and break up with him. And as for the awful things, if they are that bad he needs to be seeing some police officers in his life.
Threatening to commit suicide if a girlfriend or boyfriend breaks up with the person is a kind of emotional extortion or emotional blackmail. That is just not right to put a person in such a place. He should be taken seriously as whenever someone threatens suicide, no one knows if that person is serious, and it shouldn't be left up to chance as you seem to realize. You seem to have done the right things such as talking with his mother about it and even talking to a therapist. You're not responsible for his behavior and you need to stay safe, too, as someone else suggested.





A helpline for those wanting to hurt themselves: 1-800-273-8255