My 'husband' is a neanderthal?

Will someone out there please tell me how to deal with him? I'm at the end of my rope. I have to take pills just to cope with this situation. My hair is falling out, I'm sick at my stomach all the time and I can't stop crying. That idiot 'husband' of mine is asleep in the recliner right now -- snoring like a locomotive, wearing a viking helmet and a deerskin loincloth. He does this every night. He also gets drunk every single night. He also smokes two packs of cigarettes a day, belches so loud he can be heard across the street, has long, craggy-yellowed toenails and breath like an open grave. I practically forced him to apply for a job I heard about where I work and he has done nothing but b***h about it night and day since he was hired. He just wants to sit around and drink beer and watch dirty movies all day. I used to come home in the evening after a hard day's work and he would be sitting there in his loincloth drinking beer. I would pick up all his beer cans -- some of which were filled with pee cause he's too lazy to walk to the bathroom and fix dinner. He just gulps it down like some sort of polar bear, belches, farts and then wants sex. I've kicked him out twice but I keep bringing him home because I don't want to be a two-time divorced loser. How can I make him change? Do I give up and just become a filthy, drunken sleazebag like him or do I get better medication?My 'husband' is a neanderthal?
You didn't know this BEFORE you married him?My 'husband' is a neanderthal?
you just love him, faults and all, just like you promised to do on your wedding day. To do anything less would make you unreliable and a liar and hypocrite.
And you married him?





What does that say about you!!!!
there's no way this is real. nobody is this universally repulsive.





on the outside chance it's real, it sounds like you have no respect or love left for him. wouldn't it be better to be on your own than to be with someone you obviously have so little affection for?
This man sounds like a disgusting piece of mold hanging out in your house.





If the feelings aren't there, and from the way you describe him I think it's safe to say they aren't, then do what you feel is right. Don't become like him, don't get a better medication, but talk to someone (a therapist) and see if she/he can help you deal with your feelings. If not, you may have to consider taking some space from him, and don't bring him home this time. Give him a chance to clean up his act and change his lifestyle. Who knows maybe he'll surprise you, maybe not. Worth a shot though. You sound miserable. Doesn't seem worth it if you have to take pills just to be near him.
And what is wrong with being a two-time divorce lady? I believe you are only stopping you in this problem.
okay he's normal
Push him out the door and burn his recliner.


And make him pay the bills.
This is one sad tale. And you sure know how to pick em. You can't make anyone change...you've tried...how's it workin so far. From what I can see, you two really belong together because you don't have any self-respect either, and you'll end up an addict just like him...';better medication.';


If you really want advice, here it is...kick this loser to the curb, become a twice divorced person, stay single for a long time so you can figure out where your self respect went, and why you attract such losers. The choice is yours.
Did he turn into this caveman after the wedding?? Think I would be running to divorce court instead of looking for stronger meds.
Honey is that you? Could you please pass me a beer?
If that's your definition of ';neanderthal'; then yes, he most certainly is.





The more important question is why you choose to keep this person as your life partner?





If you are worried about others judging you for being a ';two time divorced loser,'; perhaps you should work on why you are so concerned about what others think. What YOU think, feel and need is much more important. If divorcing him is the right decision for YOU, that's all that matters. And in the future anyone is so uncouth as to question your past decisions, I'd suggest simply assuring them (with confidence!) that it was the right thing for you to do and that you deserved better. It's really nobody's business but your own (and possibly a future partner).





The reason he treats you like this is BECAUSE YOU ALLOW IT. Do you know how people learn how to treat us? From US. I'm not saying he's right (he sounds like a lazy, people-using loser), but you actually enable him to live like he does, and you put up with the disrespect. A landlord wouldn't put up with his not paying rent just because he doesn't want to be an X-time had-to-evict-another-tenant loser. The store wouldn't provide him free beer. It's highly doubtful anyone would wander in and clean up his pee-filled beer cans out of the kindness of their heart or because he's just so darn cute. Your current arrangement *works* for him. If it isn't working for you, it's time to decide what you want in your life, and settle for nothing less.
Try marriage counseling
My advice is stronger meds.


He sounds awesome to me.
I would love to introduce your husband to my wife.